It's never just about the trash can.

This is from a FB post I posted today... I'm putting it here for safe keeping... I may add to it later. :)

As social animals, we attribute meaning to things and hope that the language we speak is shared with those we speak to. But unlike other "lower" animals, we tend to load all that meaning with feelings, rumination, perception, and sometimes, a hint of insecurity. So, when a parent gets mad about the kids not picking up after themselves in the kitchen, it's rarely  just about the dishes (but also about self- sufficiency, respect, obedience). When one grandchild gets the bulk of an inheritance, its not just about the money (but also about rejection, anger, grief). When wives get mad that husbands didn’t take out the trash, it's rarely just about the garbage.... I think you can see what I'm talking about... Here's some more wordy reflections from the good Professor Graham (that's not her picture!)-

http://blogs.democratandchronicle.com/her-community/?p=10514